Wanted: A Kick in the…

…confidence (although, I could probably use a kick in the other thing you were thinking of when you read the title of this post too).

Drawing has never been my strong suit. In fact, I’m pretty terrible at it. I don’t know if it’s my unsteady hand or my non-existent ability to properly translate an object’s proportion from real life into a drawing, but my attempts to do anything in the realm of drawing are usually quite pathetic.

I would often find myself staring blankly into space during my drawing classes while everyone else’s pencils were flying furiously over their drawing pads. Even my instructor knew I was a lost cause, eventually she just stopped coming over to my little corner of the room to offer assistance.

I was that bad.

I still am pretty bad. Fortunately, I have honed my digital ‘drawing’ skills over the years, so my work is somewhat passable. But I really, really want to be able to pick up a pencil or a pen and draw something that looks reasonably like what it is meant to represent. There is a certain sense of accomplishment that comes with drawing with pen and ink that one doesn’t get when manipulating pixels on a computer screen. I want to feel that sense of accomplishment.

So, I dug out my pencils, bought some new pens, and picked up a sketch pad and some drawing paper. My intention was/is to participate in Illustration Friday.

Last Friday, I checked the theme for the week and even had an idea within a few hours. I didn’t really have much time to work on it this week and, here I am, on Thursday afternoon with a few doodles and nothing substantial. About halfway through the week, I realized that my work is nowhere near the quality of what I was seeing whenever I would peruse other people’s submissions. How can I possibly post a link to my work and put myself in the same category as these artists?

Would that I could be that ballsy.

I still like the concept that I’ve been working on and I would love to actually finish an illustration, even if it isn’t good enough to share with the Illustration Friday crowd. Actually, I would love to finish an illustration that’s good enough to share with the Illustration Friday crowd and share it instead of being so chickenshit. What’s the worst that could happen?

photo: pen & ink something or other by yours truly

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